Ya, I think Ashley would like another gift, too. She is pretty awesome after all.

Who else do you know that would pick up their life and move to another country with two cats and a husband with weird hair and find a new job and friends and learn to say football when she means soccer and not American football because that’s just weird and why do British people call cookies biscuits?

Like, what’s going on there? A biscuit is doughy and soft, not crunchy and sweet. How did the Americans and British even deviate here, they’re TWO COMPLETELY DIFFERENT THINGS! Did someone fuck up and bring a biscuit over to America in the 1700s but wanted to be one of the cool kids, so they called it a cookie? Did they make up this word?

Once they did that, did one of the other cool kids ask them: “Well, if that’s a cookie, what’s a biscuit?” And then they lied and said the complete opposite flour based food product? Like, I really want to understand what happened here.

Oh wait, where were we? Right, Ashley! Yes, let’s get her something else. Why not that new experience! It was that choice from long ago that you didn’t choose, but it’s back again, so it must be good.

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Biscuits are delicious.